It’s been a while, but the thought of writing again was always there, lurking, at the back of my mind 🙂 Hi readers!

Many a times we find ourselves dealing with feelings that we cannot understand in context and in intensity. We get carried away with handling the present feeling without looking back and pinning down what past trauma is contributing to the accentuation of these feelings of today.

Along our decades of life, in the moments where we are battered by storms and are carried away by our own hurricanes, we hurriedly try to shove off the dirt and move on with our lives as quickly as we can, as if nothing happened, as if we hadn’t just been shaken to the core. We do this to ourselves, we personally dismiss our own being to forget and strut on.

But what this really does to us is that it stores all these feelings, cunningly tucks them away safely so that one day when we’re at our extreme low levels, they are all sent crashing back to us. The feelings of hurt, anger, deceit, guilt, unfairness, bitter astonishment and the most pungent – hypocrisy. You feel them breaking out your chest.

One minds to ask, but why do we allow all this to happen to us? Why do we sit idly while these feelings creep inside us until we can no longer control them? It’s a wonder I am beginning to delve into myself and thinking back, I am convincing myself even more that this is a phenomenon to be alert to throughout our decades.

So after decades of accumulated ‘debt’, and/or more likely ‘trauma’ we are made to hit the amber button as we no longer can understand ourselves and our reactions. Shaking ourselves back to normal, motivated, happy people is the aim right? Yeah right. The million dollar question is the big HOW? This is where the theorists kick in, where the groups of experts that surround us barge in (mind you the same group of experts that probably put us here in the first place) and where if we’re unlucky enough, we end up bleeding next to the same people who have twisted that knife all along.

More thought to be given to this topic, as I have not put my finger on the way forward yet. But what’s for sure is that it bugs me to death that it’s so easy to be sucked into pain but so hard to regain yourself back.

Yours truly,

Brianna